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Don t Let Your Kids Kill You

Don t Let Your Kids Kill You Author Charles Rubin
ISBN-10 9780967979076
Release 2012-11-12
Pages 225
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Defies the myth that parents must sacrific themselves. Instead, shows them how to reclaim their power, balance, happiness...and lives. When kids turn to substance abuse, parents also become vicims as they watch their children transform into irrational and antisocial individuals. This harrowing scenario finds parents buckling beneath the stress--often with catastrophoric consequences: Divorce, career upsets, breakdowns and worse. "Don't Let Your Kids Kill You" is a landmark work that dares focus on the plight of the confused, distressed parent and not the erring child. It sets aside any preconceived ideas that parents are to blame for what is essentially a full-blown global crisis. Drawing on interviews with parents who've survived the heartbreak of kids on drugs, combined with his own experience, Charles Rubin provides practical advice on how parents can help themselves and their families by first attending to their own needs. Liberation begins when you open this book.



When Our Grown Kids Disappoint Us

When Our Grown Kids Disappoint Us Author Jane Adams
ISBN-10 1439106827
Release 2008-06-20
Pages 224
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How do today's parents cope when the dreams we had for our children clash with reality? What can we do for our twenty- and even thirty-somethings who can't seem to grow up? How can we help our depressed, dependent, or addicted adult children, the ones who can't get their lives started, who are just marking time or even doing it? What's the right strategy when our smart, capable "adultolescents" won't leave home or come boomeranging back? Who can we turn to when the kids aren't all right and we, their parents, are frightened, frustrated, resentful, embarrassed, and especially, disappointed? In this groundbreaking book, a social psychologist who's been chronicling the lives of American families for over two decades confronts our deepest concerns, including our silence and self-imposed sense of isolation, when our grown kids have failed to thrive. She listens to a generation that "did everything right" and expected its children to grow into happy, healthy, successful adults. But they haven't, at least, not yet -- and meanwhile, we're letting their problems threaten our health, marriages, security, freedom, careers or retirement, and other family relationships. With warmth, empathy, and perspective, Dr. Adams offers a positive, life-affirming message to parents who are still trying to "fix" their adult children -- Stop! She shows us how to separate from their problems without separating from them, and how to be a positive force in their lives while getting on with our own. As we navigate this critical passage in our second adulthood and their first, the bestselling author of I'm Still Your Mother reminds us that the pleasures and possibilities of postparenthood should not depend on how our kids turn out, but on how we do!



Afraid to Let Go for Parents of Adult Addicts and Alcoholics

Afraid to Let Go  for Parents of Adult Addicts and Alcoholics Author Mary Crocker Cook
ISBN-10 1611700922
Release 2012
Pages 190
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"You are not Codependent simply because your adult child is an addict or alcoholic." All parents of addicted children of any age are terrified, confused, feel out of control, lose sleep, dread the phone calls at 3:00 in the morning. This book is for parents who are "Afraid to Let Go" because they do not know how to set boundaries with their adult children without feeling crippling anxiety, or walling themselves off to make separation possible. You can't "let go." You can't "detach with love." You can't let them "hit bottom." You can't seem to implement the strategies you have learned when you are faced with your adult child's chaos and anxiety. When you try to do this, it makes you physically and emotionally ill, and the anxiety and fear becomes unbearable. "Why can't you just "let go"? " If you are struggling with Codependency, your relationship with your child is not be the only relationship where you experience a loss of self, over-reactivity, adrenalin rushes when you feel "out of control," or behave intrusively or impulsively to "help" in situations even when your assistance has not been requested. If you are Codependent, this is not the first relationship in which you have "over-given" and then felt resentful, or sacrificed yourself to give someone what you decided they "needed" because if you don't, "who will"? "Afraid to Let Go" explores the developmental origins of Codependency that lead to painful behavioral reactivity in response to our addicted adult children. Afraid to Let Go then connects the chronic stress of the chaos of addiction with adrenal system damage, and points you toward concrete behavioral changes you can make to heal regardless of the sobriety of your adult child. "About the author: " Mary Crocker Cook, D.Min., LMFT, CADCII is a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist with extensive experience working with addicted families over the last 20 years. She is the author of ""Awakening Hope. A Developmental, Behavioral and Biological Approach to Codependency Treatment,"" and coordinates the Alcohol and Drug Studies Program at San Jose City College in San Jose, California.



The Joey Song

The Joey Song Author Sandra Swenson
ISBN-10 9781937612719
Release 2014-09-09
Pages 200
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The Joey Song illuminates the hard truth—sometimes addicts don’t recover. However, with love and faith, their families can.



Smoke and Mirrors

Smoke and Mirrors Author Dorothy Marie England
ISBN-10 0880281669
Release 2015-12-23
Pages 112
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Written by dependency counselor Dorothy Marie England, a recovering dependency sufferer herself, Smoke and Mirrors exposes the unreal world in which the dependent person lives and the tricks used to deceive self and others. Drawing from the 12-step program of Alcoholics Anonymous, Mrs. England completes the circle of addiction recovery by clearly establishing the importance one's relationship with God plays in a full and freeing recovery. An important book for any leader and for those who deal with dependency in their friends and family.



When Your Adult Child Breaks Your Heart

When Your Adult Child Breaks Your Heart Author Joel Young
ISBN-10 9781493003969
Release 2013-12-03
Pages 264
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Behind nearly every adult who is accused of a crime, becomes addicted to drugs or alcohol, or who is severely mentally ill and acting out in public, there is usually at least one extremely stressed-out parent. This parent may initially react with the bad news of their adult child behaving badly with, "Oh no!" followed by, "How can I help to fix this?" A very common third reaction is the thought, "Where did I go wrong--was it something I said or did, or that I failed to do when my child was growing up that caused these issues? Is this really somehow all my fault?" These parents then open their homes, their pocketbooks, their hearts, and their futures to "saving" their adult child--who may go on to leave them financially and emotionally broken. Sometimes these families also raise the children their adult children leave behind: 1.6 million grandparents in the U.S. are in this situation. This helpful book presents families with quotations and scenarios from real suffering parents (who are not identified), practical advice, and tested strategies for coping. It also discusses the fact that parents of adult children may themselves need therapy and medications, especially antidepressants. The book is written in a clear, reassuring manner by Dr. Joel L. Young, medical director of the Rochester Center for Behavioral Medicine in Rochester Hills, Michigan; with noted medical writer Christine Adamec, author of many books in the field. In the wake of the Newtown shooting and the viral popularity of the post "I Am Adam Lanza's Mother," America is now taking a fresh look, not only at gun control, but also on how we treat mental illness. Another major issue is our support or stigmatization of those with adult children who are a major risk to their families as well to society itself. This book is part of that conversation.



Tending Dandelions

Tending Dandelions Author Sandra Swenson
ISBN-10 9781616497217
Release 2017-09-05
Pages 200
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Mothers of addicted and alcoholic children share a deep connection—one that is rarely understood by anyone who hasn’t experienced a similar path. Sharing our perspectives helps us all grow stronger, together. “We all need to take a closer look at the things we’ve avoided—the things lurking around in this place where love and addiction meet—so we’re as strong as we can be.” —Sandra Swenson, author of Tending Dandelions In the shadows of our child’s struggles with addiction, we find ourselves tending to a life for which we weren’t prepared. These meditations continue the tradition of Hazelden’s beloved meditation books by providing moments of recognition, confession, and healing for those who are realizing that recovery rarely follows a neat or comfortable path. Along the way, we plant beautiful roses only to be injured by their thorns, and we pull up unwanted dandelions that, at times, are our only source of wishes. By sharing the realities we never expected our families to face, mothers of addicted children support each other through experiences that can only be feared and imagined by others. From our shared struggles emerge opportunities for personal growth. Tending Dandelions is a vital source of wisdom, support, and strength that helps us begin our own journey of recovery.



Addict in the House

Addict in the House Author Robin Barnett
ISBN-10 9781626252622
Release 2016-08-01
Pages 192
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"This is a straightforward, rich resource for anyone who lives with, and loves, an addict." —Publishers Weekly Everyone suffers when there’s an addict in the family. Written by an expert in alcohol and drug addiction and recovery, this no-nonsense guide will help you understand the causes of addiction, end enabling behaviors, support your loved one’s recovery, and learn how to cope with relapses. If you’re the family member of an addict, you may feel confused, guilty, and scared of doing the wrong thing. And when you don’t know how to help, you may find yourself in a codependent role, trying so hard to keep your addicted loved one alive, out of jail, or emotionally appeased that you may actually prevent them from realizing they need help. Drawing on her own personal experience with her brother’s addiction, Addict in the House offers a pragmatic, step-by-step guide to dealing with a loved one’s addiction, from accepting the reality of the disease to surviving what may be repeated cycles of recovery and relapse. You’ll learn how to encourage your addicted loved one to get help without forcing it, and finally find the strength to let go of codependence. With this revealing and straightforward book, you’ll have the support you need to take an honest look at how addiction has affected the family, cope with the emotional hurdles of having an addicted family member, create and maintain firm boundaries, and make informed decisions about how to best help your loved one.



Parenting the Addicted Teen

Parenting the Addicted Teen Author Barbara Krovitz-Neren
ISBN-10 1942094434
Release 2017
Pages 200
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A step-by-step guide to reclaiming your parenting power from your child's addiction and to recreating a functioning, joyful family life.



Setting Boundaries with Your Adult Children

Setting Boundaries   with Your Adult Children Author Allison Bottke
ISBN-10 9780736938587
Release 2008-02-01
Pages 224
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This important and compassionate new book from the creator of the successful God Allows U-Turns series will help parents and grandparents of the many adult children who continue to make life painful for their loved ones. Writing from firsthand experience, Allison identifies the lies that kept her, and ultimately her son in bondage--and how she overcame them. Additional real life stories from other parents are woven through the text. A tough-love book to help readers cope with dysfunctional adult children, "Setting Boundaries with Your Adult Children" will empower families by offering hope and healing through S.A.N.I.T.Y.--a six-step program to help parents regain control in their homes and in their lives. S = STOP Enabling, STOP Blaming Yourself, and STOP the Flow of Money A = Assemble a Support Group N = Nip Excuses in the Bud I = Implement Rules/Boundaries T = Trust Your Instincts Y = Yield Everything to God Foreword by Carol Kent ("When I Lay My Isaac Down")



Tough Love

Tough Love Author Pauline Neff
ISBN-10 0687018250
Release 1996-01-01
Pages 158
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Tough Love is hope. It is help. It is a way of recovery for drug abusers, and a positive, supportive program for their families. Tough Love is a gift of love and a gift of life for those who practice its plan. It is a book for all parents, especially those whose children are now on drugs or are exposed to those who use drugs. Pauline Neff has gathered enthralling, real-life accounts of young drug users who needed help and of their parents' role in seeing that they received it. Eight families describe, in very graphic, heartrending terms, how their children successfully beat the drug habit through The Palmer Drug Abuse Program. PDAP is a privately financed twelve-step program, similar to the steps of AA. Ms. Neff explains each step to show how families can interpret and work through these steps in their own lives. Thousands of young people have found help through this method. Families have been reunited, and parents' own lives have been changed drastically in the process. If you are a parent of a young person in America today, Tough Love may be the most important book you will ever read. It may save your life.



Sober Siblings

Sober Siblings Author Patricia Olsen
ISBN-10 9781600940552
Release 2008
Pages 227
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Provides helpful tips and advice for setting up boundaries, dealing with guilt, understanding the difference between helping and enabling, and coming to terms with the truth of alcoholism itself. Original.



Leaning on Thin Air

Leaning on Thin Air Author Charles Rubin
ISBN-10 0918915074
Release 2017-02-01
Pages 216
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Boston, 1969, Vietnam War protests, police brutality, and in the middle of iit, an uncompromising advertising writer, His last chance in the business and the obstacles he meets, plus murder and mayhem and the workings of how an ad agency works, the ad campaigns, the politics, the egos, the romantic spisodes, and a twist ending.



The Collapse of Parenting

The Collapse of Parenting Author Leonard Sax
ISBN-10 9780465073849
Release 2015-12-29
Pages 304
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In The Collapse of Parenting, physician, psychologist, and internationally acclaimed author Leonard Sax presents data documenting a dramatic decline in the achievement and psychological health of American children. Sax argues that rising levels of obesity, depression, and anxiety among young people—as well as the explosion in prescribing psychiatric medications to kids—can all be traced to parents letting their kids call the shots. Many parents are afraid of seeming too dictatorial and end up abdicating their authority rather than taking a stand with their own children. If kids refuse to eat anything green and demand pizza instead, some parents give in, inadvertently raising children who are more likely to become obese. If children are given smartphones and allowed to spend the bulk of their free time texting, playing video games, and surfing the Internet, they become increasingly reliant on peers and the media for guidance on how to live, rather than getting such guidance at home. And if they won't sit still in class or listen to adults, they're often prescribed medication, a quick fix that actually undermines their self-control. In short, Sax argues, parents are failing to prioritize the parent-child relationship and are allowing a child-peer dynamic to take precedence. The result is children who have no absolute standard of right and wrong, who lack discipline, and who look to their peers and the Internet for direction, instead of looking to their parents. But there is hope. Sax shows how parents can help their kids by reasserting their authority—by limiting time with screens, by encouraging better habits at the dinner table and at bedtime, and by teaching humility and perspective. Drawing on more than twenty-five years of experience as a family physician and psychologist, along with hundreds of interviews with children, parents, and teachers across the United States and around the world, Sax offers a blueprint parents can use to refresh and renew their relationships with their children to help their children thrive in an increasingly complicated world.



Teens Under the Influence

Teens Under the Influence Author Katherine Ketcham
ISBN-10 9780307491718
Release 2008-11-26
Pages 432
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Across the United States, in small towns and major cities, in suburbs and slums, in public and private schools, thousands of kids are experimenting with drugs. Many of them will become addicts; some will die. The first and only book to focus entirely on adolescent alcohol and other drug use, Teens Under the Influence addresses the immediate dangers that threaten these kids—exploring the short- and long-term effects of their addiction and giving parents solid, sensitive, practical advice to combat this growing epidemic. Knowledge is the key to defeating drug addictions, and that is what this comprehensive, timely new book provides. Full of candid true stories from adolescent drug users, with facts based on the most recent scientific research, Teens Under the Influence tells you exactly what you need to know to deal with your child’s problem, covering such important topics as • The common myths and misconceptions about drug addiction • The crucial differences between adult and adolescent dependency • The reasons kids get hooked • The stages of adolescent addiction • The different kinds of drugs kids use and combine • Various treatment options and how to choose the best treatment for your child • Strategies for handling relapses Teens Under the Influence offers practical help that may save your child’s life. It may save the life of a friend. And it may save your own.



The Clinician s Handbook

The Clinician s Handbook Author Robert G. Meyer
ISBN-10 9781478609674
Release 2006-08-22
Pages 480
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This extremely versatile handbook, written for students and practitioners, taps current treatment and assessment research to provide up-to-date coverage of emotional and behavioral disorders, major DSM-IV-TR diagnostic categories, MMPI-2 correlates and other test-response patterns, and treatment options. Diagnostic concepts and observations are linked with specific assessment and test data for diagnostic categories; this is then integrated with recommended intervention procedures. In a single volume, the authors have synthesized an abundance of information and presented it in a manageable and accessible manner. Their extensive experience in clinical and forensic psychologyteaching, conducting research, interacting with clients, working in the criminal justice systemhighly qualifies them to know and present the kind of practical information students and practitioners need. Additional outstanding features . . . emphasizes multimodal assessment and treatment includes extensive discussions of clinical challenges, such as suicidal clients, the criminal personality, deception, and malingering offers bibliotherapy reading assignments and appropriate relaxation techniques for various types of clients provides coverage of legal issuescompetency, criminal responsibility, and civil commitment presents useful tips on case preparation and professional practice in the office and the courtroom



The Essential Family Guide to Borderline Personality Disorder

The Essential Family Guide to Borderline Personality Disorder Author Randi Kreger
ISBN-10 9781592857838
Release 2009-06-03
Pages 304
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Gentle counsel and realistic advice for families contending with one of today's most misunderstood forms of mental illness. "Randi Kreger has done it again! With her new book, she continues to make the dynamics of Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) readily accessible to those of us who love, live with and treat people who suffer from this complex condition." Blaise Aguirre, MD, Medical Director, Adolescent Dialectical Behavior Therapy Residential Program, McLean Hospital"Kreger's communication techniques, grounded in the latest research, provide family members with the essential ability to regain a genuine, meaningful relationship with their loved one with Borderline Personality Disorder." Debra Resnick, Psy.D., President, Psychological Services and Human Development Center"This book offers hope for those who think their situation has none." Rachel Reiland, author of Get Me Out of Here: My Recovery from Borderline Personality DisorderFor family members of people with Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD), home life is routinely unpredictable and frequently unbearable. Extreme mood swings, impulsive behaviors, unfair blaming and criticism, and suicidal tendencies common conduct among those who suffer from the disorder leave family members feeling confused, hurt, and helpless.In Stop Walking on Eggshells, Randi Kreger's pioneering first book which sold more than 340,000 copies, she and co-author Paul T. Mason outlined the fundamental differences in the way that people with BPD relate to the world. Now, with The Essential Family Guide to Borderline Personality Disorder, Kreger takes readers to the next level by offering them five straightforward tools to organize their thinking, learn specific skills, and focus on what they need to do to get off the emotional rollercoaster:Take care of yourselfUncover what keeps you feeling stuckCommunicate to be heardSet limits with loveReinforce the right behaviorsTogether the steps provide a clear-cut system designed to help friends and family reduce stress, improve their relationship with their borderline loved one, improve their problem-solving skills and minimize conflict, and feel more self-assured about setting limits.Randi Kreger is the co-author of Stop Walking on Eggshells and the author of The Stop Walking on Eggshells Workbook. She operates bpdcentral.com, one of the top web-based resources for those living with BPD, and runs the Welcome to Oz online family support groups based at her web site. Cofounder of the Personality Disorder Awareness Network, Kreger is frequently invited to lecture on BPD and related issues, both for clinicians and laypeople.